Beneath It All - cmbabydoll

Beneath It All - cmbabydoll

Review by Sherioka

Title - 4/5

The title matched the ending well, and when you first read it, you’ll be like “What’s this?” But after reading the story and knowing what’s happening, you’ll notice that the title is full of meaning. Just a small notice for naming titles, the simpler the better, the shorter the better. You can use some eye-catching phrases or words from the story as the title. It’ll have more meaning to it.

Appearance - 3/5

The poster was a bit blurry, but the colors and pictures you used were nice and the poster was made with emotion, not a lot of effects and materials. I like that.

Forewords - 8/10

It was a short foreword, but you described your story well, you got to the main point of the story and left a little question in the reader’s head. Motivating them to read more, like what you did to me. Could have been longer and described more, but overall, it was well written and mysterious.

Storyline - 15/15

It’s interesting, it’s different than most stories and it was full of creativity and surprises. I’ve never read this kind of love story before, you can say it’s fresh and new. Although you could of added more emotions and mysteries. It’ll be more interesting.

Story Flow - 15/15

It’s on a really steady pace, in each chapter, what needs to be said is said, what needs to be done is done. You made each chapter full of information and you didn’t slack off on any chapter. The story slowly unfolds and the truth comes out, you didn’t rush it or make it too slow. Not many people can keep the flow of the story under control, its great!

Character development - 14/15

The characters have a complicated relationship; you can’t miss out on any of the characters since they’re all so important. And you didn’t, each character’s part was developed with a little bit of mystery, you didn’t let everyone know everything all at once. The relationship and progress was exciting and full of love…and comedy, it was great.

Descriptions - 7/10

Well, throughout the whole process of the story, you didn’t described a lot or too less. Maybe you can work on describing the character’s personalities; you didn’t really make it clear. And the reader might want to know more about what the characters are thinking. And maybe adding a bit more description and adjectives when writing the romance parts, keep it up!

Correct Spelling/Grammar - 4/5

No big mistakes! You must be a careful person. I just wanted to warn you to watch out for little typos, like spelling the character’s name’s wrong. People wouldn’t mind stuff like that, but it’s better if there were no mistakes at all.

Keeping Interest - 9/10

I had fun reading the story, it was full of passion. I read through the whole story in just an hour, no breaks or anything. The story was fun and unlike other mystery stories. How to say this…It was, well, enjoyable and easy to understand.

Ending - 5/5

I liked the ending a lot, it was the cutest of all chapters. It had romance, comedy, friendship and all those genres in it! You gave it a lovely ending by describing carefully and making the ending full of fluff. I keep on saying the same thing, but it was truly very well written. All those emotions are finally revealed. Great ending, great story, I really enjoyed it.

Bonus points: 5/5

You get bonus points for waiting so long so patiently. As a result, the web-missie has decided to feature your fanfic on our site for a month. :) Thank you for bearing with us.  

FINAL SCORE: 89/100

Thank you for requesting with Eternal Happiness and we hope you request from us again soon!

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Review by Sherioka from Eternal Happiness

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